Friday, December 29, 2006
New Anti Terror Products Unveiled

These new products are the result of research and testing to determine what terrorizes the terrorists? We now present a product which, if used correctly will cause any terrorists to avoid you and your property.

Like many people who want to do something about terrorism, and realizing that the Senate, House of Represenatives and the media, will do nothing to stop terror; someone had to do something. While the terrorists are planning and plotting to kill all of us, our media and Congress are planning and plotting to see our President impeached.

The way Webloafer Industries sees this, George Walker Bush is one of a few people in Washington D.C. fighting and succeeding in the war against terror.

Here is our new line of products…….

Cute pigs and pig scented candles
Scented voltive candles and Herbal (Pork Scented) Cigarettes.
Soap on a rope (Bacon Scented) and Piggie Potpourii.
Sticks of Smelly Stuff, and our top of the line product, Bacon and Eggs Scented Spray.

You may have noticed
that these products are ones
that you associate with scent,
and you are right.
Here are the different scents available….
For each of these products.


If only all homes, malls, sporting arenas, libraries, public toilets, halls of congress or public transit systems of America had the aroma of bacon (frying in a cast-iron skillet) permeating the area, they would be safe. Think upon the things that are in STAYING ALIVE....

A lot of Americans remember the wonderful scent of bacon frying in a cast iron skillet, on Grandmothers wood burning stove……..that wonderful scent is one that almost all Americans love. (even vegans, smile when the scent of Maple or Hickory Cured Bacon being fried permeates the room)
Always use your enemy’s phobias to defeat them. Oh I know not many Democrats would agree, because they are blinded by their hatred for our President. I have come to the conclusion that most Democrats want us to lose the war on terror, so that George Walker Bush will be impeached.
My countries enemies hate pork and pigs; so lets flood America with Pork, yes pork this and pork that.

Pork Phobia is another one of those things muslims have copied from the Jews they detest.

Yes the Islamafacists, are scared to death of hogs, pigs, bacon, pork chops, chicaronnes and Lard.

That will be their downfall, for Webloafer Industries has created a complete line of Antiterrorist Products that you can use to keep these killers where they belong, and that would be almost anywhere but here in the USofA.

Let ‘em have a whiff of bacon and eggs…..a really strong whiff.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

your best article yet
But you did not include an ordr form.

Anonymous FlyUSAboy said...

Laughing, but worried.
Just surfing and came across this, I only wish it was as simple as you make it seem. My nephew was killed while helping the irakis. Who do we sue? He was a beautiful boyman, a boy turning into a man, but he is dead, and which should I do? Mourn, or

Blogger phred said...

Good idea...maybe the airlines could serve bacon bits or pork rines instead of peanuts...
You know what is really gonna get the terrorist? Someday when they hear something and look at the eastern sky and realize that God says what He means and means what He says.
Merry CHRISTmas !

Blogger phred said...

.. oops.. pork rinds

Blogger AnthonyLemons said...

I love pork, should we really waste it on some loser terrorists? We can just feed them hot hollow point lead.

Anonymous ENgteac said...

With a little editing, this rant of yours would be funny enough to be published. You should work a little harder on your grammer, spelling and presentation. With a little more schooling, I am sure you could be successful.

Blogger web_loafer said...

I dropped out of schooling.

It didn't take long for me to come to the conclusion, I don't like most successful people.

Now I said MOST.

With that in mind, why would I want to be successful and have to mingle with successful people all day?

I would rather sit down to coffee with a fellow trucker at a truck stop, than sit down in a fancy establishment with the likes of Nancy Pelosi.

Blogger Anthony Lemons said...

I will order me a case of all of those please.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I wonder if they let Sadsack Ihhumane have a pork chop before stretching his neck to proper size?

Blogger Kevin said...

I only have questions...

Democrats want us to lose the war so they can impeach George Walker Bush? We don't need that to get Dubya. Succeeding in war on terror?

Have you been taking bubble baths with Tony Snow?

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